6 Murderesses
by LittleNeko23
Summary: Six women with something in common, they're tired of their mans filthy habits and cheating ways. They decide to end it all! it was a murder but not a crime. Based on Cell Block Tango from Chicago
1. Pop

Being a newlywed was a beautiful feeling. Between endless days and very warm nights the glow was nothing but bliss.

Chi-Chi was the housewife she longed to be and with a man so pure and full of life.

What could possibly go wrong?

Goku's little habit actually.

Chi-Chi learned quickly that her new husband had an appetite that could feed the country and then some. It took many meal to fill Goku, Chi-chi tried to not let it bother her as it gave her an excuse to try new recipes. So again nothing was wrong.

Well his food obsession wasn't the issue it was _how_ he ate that drove the princess up the walls.

When Goku ate he took tremendous bites and every single morsel was visible to her. He ate never bothered to swallow before stuffing another poor piece of meat into his maw forcing Chi-Chi to see disgustedly down his gullet. Chi-Chi never finally brought it up one day.

"Goku," She started softly surprised he could hear over his obnoxious chewing. "Goku listen, when you eat you have to take smaller bite or else you'll choke and for heaven's sakes close your mouth."

He did, a large bulge going down his throat. "Sorry Chi." he said simply and watched as she ate daintily so he could mimic her. It was hard for the Saiyan to stop his nature from telling him to gobble the delicious food but he'd try for her.

This lasted an amazing whole day before he was back to horking down his food like no tomorrow.

The chewing.

The slurping.

Oh Kami the popping sound after licking his greasy fingers clean was probably the worst. "Stop Goku. I know you don't know better but we went over this!" She told him again, the aggravation evident in her voice.

"I can't help it!" He replied mouth still full.

"Try!"

Chi-Chi tossed a napkin at her husband but he purposely didn't take it. What was the point of a napkin when your tongue can do the same? She had no problem with his tongue play yesterday.

Goku picked up a chicken leg and his chopsticks then threw both leg and rice in his mouth. "This is really good ya'know." he pulled out a clean chicken bone.

"…Thank you." Chi-Chi was looking away at this point, no longer caring to gape at the man. Her blood was boiling and heart racing. She saw red.

The next day would prove to be the final straw as she sat across from that man and literally saw every tiny bit of food enter his mouth.

"Ahm!" He said then a new piece was introduced to the others.

Chew.

Slurp.

Gulp.

Pop.

"Ahm!"

Chew!

Slurp!

Glup!

Pop!

SLURP! Slurping the sauce off his lips!

Ripping off the beef from the bone to CHEW as loudly as possible!

Making a huge show of swallowing the disgusting mass he'd clump in his chipmunk cheeks

Then finishing off the horrid symphony with a POP!

Chi-Chi couldn't take it anymore.

It felt like she'd lost her mind just predicting when the next sound would erupt from his body.

And then it hit her...literally. From out his jaw a piece of rice plopped right on her cheek. Chi-Chi thought she could've been covered in slime and care less than how she felt when that insignificant piece of rice landed on her.

She stood and without Goku seeming to notice she took the a shotgun off the kitchen wall and checked. Sure enough two bullets still nestled in the break action.

Her father gave them the gun as a wedding gift and Chi-Chi only bothered to load it for her father's sake.

Goku never heard Chi-Chi click the gun close or even use his sensitive hearing to alert him to her almost sloppy attempt to place it right on her shoulder.

It was too late anyhow as Chi-Chi simply aimed it straight at Goku's head and before the last POP could be heard a loud BLAM took it's place and then another. Goku's head fell forward into his food and coated the plates with pooling blood.

Chi-Chi's vision finally cleared and what she saw didn't surprise her. She knew what she did and what she did was purposeful. The only thing left to do would be to tell the truth.

Son Chi-Chi killed Son Goku and she regretted nothing.


	2. Six

And with one single wish it was over, My adventure for the perfect boyfriend was finished and while I didn't make a wish to the dragon I certainly got my man in the form of Yamcha.

He was dashing, rugged and a total hottie!

With nowhere else to go besides the desert I convinced my parents to let him stay with us until he could get on his own two feet and let me tell ya he did that.

It felt like we were actually married as we had a pattern that was perfect between us. He'd go to his baseball practices, come home and I'd fix us a drink then we'd eat dinner together. Perfect harmony.

"Hey babe I'm gonna be out practicing longer than expected is that okay?"

I looked up from one of my blueprints and nodded, "Of course, work hard!" I cheered and he kissed my cheek before leaving off.

I sighed happily before returning to my work but before I could I heard a familiar ringtone.

It was Yamcha's phone. He must have left it by mistake.

Wonder who it is?

"Hello?"

"uhm...Hi can I speak to Yamcha?" it was a girl's voice and one I never heard before."

"Sorry he isn't here but I'll let him know you call."

"Thanks a bunches!" _click_

That was odd but probably just a fan. Yeah, a crazed fan that got his number from another team member or something.

 **10:54pm**

5 hours late but this was expected since he told me he would be, however that mysterious call bothered me the whole day. I checked both text messages and recent calls for that number and found absolutely nothing in the the ingoing or outgoing which also struck me as weird since he gets texts from people all the time.

The I thought about it the more my earlier made less and less sense. The other Taitans knew he had a girl, so why would they give a female fan his person phone number?

Easy Bulma, you promised not to be the jealous type.

(Flashback)

" _Bulma, that Hasky chick was_ attacking _me not trying to make out!"_ Yamcha had argued back at her.

" _How can I be sure,"_ she blushed suddenly and turned her face. " _How can I be sure she wouldn't steal you away? You_ are _naive to woman still."_

" _Maybe, but I'm not stupid. I like you and only you so can't you trust me a little here."_

 _Bulma nodded slowly "I promise I won't be like this again."_

'Take a deep breath and don't be defensive...even though your gut is telling you to throw a hissy fit!'

He'll be home anytime and I need to finish up.

I prepared Calamari and green tea splashed with whiskey I stole from dad's supposedly hidden cabinet. "Perfect"

"I'm back!"

Just as any housewife would I dashed to his side to kiss him. He deepened the kiss and brought my body closer. "Where's your parents?" he murmured against my lips. "Business meeting." I answered thickly "Out for the rest of the night." my head swam in the masculine scent that was Yamcha. "Good"

"But, Yamcha I made dinner for us."

"Can't it wait?" Yamcha bit down gently on my bottom lip and I nearly came undone.

I couldn't resist him so dinner sat untouched.

The next day, I awoke to the sound of the shower running and decided for a little continuation of last night.

I was almost to the door when Yamcha's phone chimed indicating a new text then it chimed again and everything in me screamed to check it out.

What if Yamcha catches you or it's no one important? But what if it's a girl? He is famous now.

Emotions overruled logic and I made a b-line for that offensive phone and saw 2 new text from an unknown number. It was different from the one last night.

The first read:

 _Good morning baby._

The second:

 _I bought a new dress hope you like it!_

So it was a girl….

My heart sank just thinking about where Yamcha could have actually been after practice if he actually even went to practice. The little phone rang and it was that same number.

This time I felt nothing but adrenaline pumping through my veins and I answered the phone.

When Yamcha finished his shower I had already dressed and made breakfast as normal. He gave me his sorry excuse of going to be late and headed out, uniform on and gear tucked snuggly in the duffle bag I made for him and the team.

I was quiet the whole exchange, he didn't even notice.

It was 11:18 when Yamcha came home and I made sure dinner was perfect.

I served all his favorites; Cha Siu Bao with egg rice and Mango pudding for dessert.

Yamcha came in a plastered a dumb smile on his face obviously delighted with his treat.

"Have a seat dear." I said sweetly and he rushed to kiss my cheek then sit. I rubbed his shoulders and he chuckled "What's all this for babe?"

"Just something special, you deserve it."

His grin widened. "Wow awesome." Yamcha dug in as did I and he hummed in happily.

"Damn this is amazing!" I blushed, loving the attention he showered upon me.

"Oh, let me pour our drinks. I almost forgot." reaching for the bottle on the table I pour two glasses. "Huh? Not spiking it think time?" Yamcha asked, "We're getting bold here."

Raising my cup I gave a toast. "To us."

"To us." we clinked glasses and he took the first sip.

That's when the coughing began and Yamcha's glass shattered onto the ground.

"What..the?"

"What wrong Yamcha?" I asked innocently "I thought you liked whisky?"

Yamcha tried to leave but his body failed and he collapsed on the floor.

"Maybe you could ask Audrey for help, or maybe Chloe. Then again, Samantha is in town right? I'm sure she'd love to see you."

Yamcha's eyes widened as I continued my tirade. "That's right, this morning Patricia texted and she told me everything!" I slammed my drink on the table and stomped to the pathetic man on the floor, saliva dribbling from his mouth.

"Six woman! You cheated on me with six other woman! Are you crazy?"

Yamcha garbled something unintelligible.

"Answer me dammit!"

"orry...so…"

"Shut it, I don't want your excuses. I thought I was a good girlfriend, perfect in fact but you wanted more, huh? I took you in and cleaned you up. Do you really think those girls would have dated you had I not done what I did for you?"

Yamcha's body spasmed and I grabbed his collar to force him to look at me, I wanted to be the very last thing he saw and the only thing he'd remember in the Otherworld.

"Oh my Kami!"

"What happened here?"

It was my parents. "Bulma dear what happened?"

With one last attempt to breath, Yamcha's pupil faded and his body limped in my hand.

"Yamcha just couldn't hold his arsenic."


End file.
